The Queen of Daytime Television is dethroning herself. On September 9, 2011, Oprah Winfrey will take her last bow as the host of the Oprah Winfrey Show, almost 25 years to the day since the program initially launched.
But Oprah's televised days are far from over, as the media mogul plans on launching the Oprah Winfrey Network — appropriately abbreviated as OWN — in early 2011. Once her show ends, she'll focus much of her energy on the brand new network.
Honestly, it's a pretty brilliant career move. In fact, it's one that several television franchises could probably follow with great success — or, at least, hilarious results. Following Oprah's move from television host to network overlord, I think these five franchises could take a similar leap from series to channel.
THE COPS NETWORK: There are few things in the world more entertaining than watching genuine footage of police officers chasing and shaking down runaway perps, drug dealers and traffic offenders. The one thing that might be more entertaining? Seeing it on the air all the frickin' time. Such would be the case on The Cops Network, which airs nothing but reruns and new installments of "Cops," with the occasional episode of "America's Most Wanted" thrown in for good measure.
THE LAW & ORDER NETWORK: Given all the various incarnations of "Law & Order," it's almost a crime that the franchise doesn't already have its own television network. The constant weekend marathons are proof enough that a network packed to the brim with Chris Meloni, Sam Waterston and the late great Jerry Orbach would have a strong audience. And by a strong audience, I mean myself. Truthfully, I just want more Ice-T on the airwaves.
THE SIMPSONS NETWORK: Can you imagine a television network where Sideshow Bob is beating himself up with rakes or Bleeding Gums Murphy is powerhousing his saxophone from the heavens at any given moment in the day? I can — and it's awesome. With no signs of slowing down, The Simpsons Network could even offer plenty of new installments to go with the reruns. Such a channel would truly be exxxxcellent.
THE STAR TREK NETWORK: Set your phasers to stunning every single day for the rest of your life with The Star Trek Network, a 24/7 smorgasbord of U.S.S. Enterprise-helmed action-adventure — except when we're talking about "Deep Space Nine" and "Voyager," that is. Trekkers could tune into this channel to get their daily dose of Klingon language lessons, and the best part of all? No "Enterprise." Even the network chiefs know better than to air that horrid mess.
THE SURVIVOR NETWORK: A television network dedicated to endless outwitting, outplaying and outlasting? Yes, please! The Jeff Probst-hosted reality show has had its ups and downs over the years, but there's still nothing more satisfying than watching a total blindside at Tribal Council or an impressive victory at an Immunity Challenge. If that kind of strategic and physical maneuvering were on television at any given moment during the day, I would be one happy camper. Just imagine the possibilities presented by a live, 24/7 feed into the Survivors' miserable daily existence. It would be glorious.
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